wingedbeast (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wingedbeast) wrote2015-03-15 09:46 pm
wingedbeast) wrote2015-03-15 09:46 pm
The Tasmanian Devil: Chapter 10
Disclaimer 1: Looney Tunes, the characters, their names, and their likenesses are owned by Warner Brothers and this indicates no claim upon their intellectual property.
Disclaimer 2: I know next to nothing about Tasmania or how actual research facilities work.
___
Elmer was well into the wild before he realized he didn't bring his rifle. ooor oha He immediately realized that he didn't need it anymore. What was a rifle but a replacement for something one lacked?
Once upon a time, in his scarcely remembered youth, Elmer would come out to the wilderness, with his father, to hunt. According to the elder Fudd, this was what it took to be a man. Elmer kept up the practice even after his father was... embarrassed. Eacho! No, not embarrassed. Why pretend? After his father was locked up and called, in hushed tones so as to avoid hurting the family or the business, insane.
Elmer had kept up the practice, to be a man. Boahaha! A man. Try as he might, he couldn't remember why he ever wanted to be such a thing.
___
Dr. Duhch looked at the two halves of Atlas Shrugged that had been dropped on his desk. He looked at the other two doctors. "I've theen him read thith multiple timeth." He pushed at one half with a pencil, as if afraid of it, to see the freyed edge. "Did he thay anything?"
"Too many woids." Dr. Bunnet had a haunted look on his face.
"Leatht of my complaintth. Where ith he, now?"
"Huntin'."
"What'th he hunting for?"
"I sign-serely hope I don't know."
"A the-ah a the-ah a the-ah There's more. When I asked him what he's researching here, he gave me a the-ah a the-ah a the-ah this." Dr. Pehg dropped the notebook onto Dr. Duhch's desk. It opened onto the writeup for an entry of "The Tasmanian Devil."
"That'th... different. He'th uthually though clothelipped about it." Dr. Duhch picked up the notebook and flipped through. "Well, there ith thuch an animal ath a Tazthmanian Devil. That theemth to be about the limit of hith accurathy."
___
A man? The beasts of dreaded Tazmania did not cower and flee before a mere man.
Elmer tilted up his head and laughed. "Huh huh huh ha ha hahaha"
Out of sheer, spiteful exhuberance, Elmer made a fist and struck at a large tree. It was no younger than a century, no weaker than tempered oak, and no more resistance than a dry cracker. Splinters and shards of wood flew in all directions.
Elmer smiled at his unharmed fist... then struck again and again, faster and faster, chunks and chips of wood flying about. His arms blurred in motion.
___
"That'th... quite a long dietary litht. But, motht of thethe aren't even found on Tazthmania." Dr. Duhch turned a page. "'Ethpethially rabbit.' Who writeth a teckthtbook like thith?"
"A le-ah a le-ah a le-ah Let's leave editorial notes aside. Mr. Fudd's reasoning may never have been very a se-ah a se-ah a se-ah sound. He may be suffering a mental a be-ah a be-ah a be-ah break."
"Let'th not jump to concluthionth. I've theen thome of the thingth they do at thothe... inthtituthionth."
"A the-ah a the-ah a the-ah There are other options. If we can convince him to come along... convince him that it's for his own good."
Dr. Bunnet looked out the door. "I don't think that's going to be an option, Doc... And I don't think it's just a mental issue."
"A we-ah a we-ah a we-ah What makes you say that, Dr. Bunnet?"
"Can you hear dat?"
In the distance, a sound rose. It was something between a whirlwind and a chainsaw.
Disclaimer 2: I know next to nothing about Tasmania or how actual research facilities work.
___
Elmer was well into the wild before he realized he didn't bring his rifle. ooor oha He immediately realized that he didn't need it anymore. What was a rifle but a replacement for something one lacked?
Once upon a time, in his scarcely remembered youth, Elmer would come out to the wilderness, with his father, to hunt. According to the elder Fudd, this was what it took to be a man. Elmer kept up the practice even after his father was... embarrassed. Eacho! No, not embarrassed. Why pretend? After his father was locked up and called, in hushed tones so as to avoid hurting the family or the business, insane.
Elmer had kept up the practice, to be a man. Boahaha! A man. Try as he might, he couldn't remember why he ever wanted to be such a thing.
___
Dr. Duhch looked at the two halves of Atlas Shrugged that had been dropped on his desk. He looked at the other two doctors. "I've theen him read thith multiple timeth." He pushed at one half with a pencil, as if afraid of it, to see the freyed edge. "Did he thay anything?"
"Too many woids." Dr. Bunnet had a haunted look on his face.
"Leatht of my complaintth. Where ith he, now?"
"Huntin'."
"What'th he hunting for?"
"I sign-serely hope I don't know."
"A the-ah a the-ah a the-ah There's more. When I asked him what he's researching here, he gave me a the-ah a the-ah a the-ah this." Dr. Pehg dropped the notebook onto Dr. Duhch's desk. It opened onto the writeup for an entry of "The Tasmanian Devil."
"That'th... different. He'th uthually though clothelipped about it." Dr. Duhch picked up the notebook and flipped through. "Well, there ith thuch an animal ath a Tazthmanian Devil. That theemth to be about the limit of hith accurathy."
___
A man? The beasts of dreaded Tazmania did not cower and flee before a mere man.
Elmer tilted up his head and laughed. "Huh huh huh ha ha hahaha"
Out of sheer, spiteful exhuberance, Elmer made a fist and struck at a large tree. It was no younger than a century, no weaker than tempered oak, and no more resistance than a dry cracker. Splinters and shards of wood flew in all directions.
Elmer smiled at his unharmed fist... then struck again and again, faster and faster, chunks and chips of wood flying about. His arms blurred in motion.
___
"That'th... quite a long dietary litht. But, motht of thethe aren't even found on Tazthmania." Dr. Duhch turned a page. "'Ethpethially rabbit.' Who writeth a teckthtbook like thith?"
"A le-ah a le-ah a le-ah Let's leave editorial notes aside. Mr. Fudd's reasoning may never have been very a se-ah a se-ah a se-ah sound. He may be suffering a mental a be-ah a be-ah a be-ah break."
"Let'th not jump to concluthionth. I've theen thome of the thingth they do at thothe... inthtituthionth."
"A the-ah a the-ah a the-ah There are other options. If we can convince him to come along... convince him that it's for his own good."
Dr. Bunnet looked out the door. "I don't think that's going to be an option, Doc... And I don't think it's just a mental issue."
"A we-ah a we-ah a we-ah What makes you say that, Dr. Bunnet?"
"Can you hear dat?"
In the distance, a sound rose. It was something between a whirlwind and a chainsaw.