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Tip #24 The Bargain
There's a common sentiment that comes up in these conversations. On the surface, it's a good sentiment an agreement that goes to the heart of communication. But, there's this baggage that it carries. It might not be fair, but there it is.
The sentiment usually goes something like "I will hear what you have to say, if you hear what I have to say."
Who could object to that? The only thing more basic to conversation as a concept is language, itself. This is what everybody should be doing. Of course, we should be doing this!
There's that baggage. That baggage goes something like "I will politely nod scan your drivel for things that fit my preconceptions until it's my turn. Once it is my turn, since I am obviously the one with the truth and you are obviously the one with drivel, you will listen and then believe, or else you weren't actually listening."
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The sentiment usually goes something like "I will hear what you have to say, if you hear what I have to say."
Who could object to that? The only thing more basic to conversation as a concept is language, itself. This is what everybody should be doing. Of course, we should be doing this!
There's that baggage. That baggage goes something like "I will politely nod scan your drivel for things that fit my preconceptions until it's my turn. Once it is my turn, since I am obviously the one with the truth and you are obviously the one with drivel, you will listen and then believe, or else you weren't actually listening."
( Read more... )