wingedbeast

Sigourney Weaver: Either you die horribly now or, six minutes from now, you die horribly with the rest of humanity.

Wot: A basic understanding of history says that's bullshit.

Sigourney Weaver: The old gods are here. You can just look over the edge.

The "Virgin": He said History. And, I think I get it. What you're doing is classic "Appeasement" strategy.

Wot: Thank you. By the way, werewolf behind you.

The "Virgin" turns and shoots the werewolf before it can pounce: Thank you.

Wot: No problem.

Sigourney Weaver: That's right. We are appeasing ancient gods, so that they don't awaken and-

Wot: Spread westward across the continent, taking our lands, dehumanizing us in their media, and otherwise do violence to us?

Sigourney Weaver: What?

The "Virgin": Westward expansion. James K. Polk and Manifest Destiny. Trail of Tears and the 20 dollar bill.

Sigourney Weaver *frustrated*: I know what moment in history he's referring to. What is the relevence.

Wot: Appeasement didn't work. Native nations tried making repeated treaties, in the hopes that America would stop, but it didn't. We were too powerful in comparison and still wanted stuff like land.

The "Virgin": Oh, and is there a Godwin monster in your collection?

Sigourney Weaver gives a look of frustrated confusion.

The "Virgin": 'caaauuuse NAZIS!

Sigourney Weaver: These are ancient gods, not human beings with human motivations.

Wot: But, they do have needs and wants and the power to get what they want without us going through all this crap.

The "Virgin": And, you're doing this because they can be angry or happy... or at least satisfied. All sounds very human to me.

Sigourney Weaver angrily puts hands on hips: Okay then, let's talk about the vikings. It was a standard practice, in churches, to put gold and valuables outside the church so that the vikings would take the gold and then go away.

Wot: That... really fits my point, though. The vikings weren't an overwhelming force. They didn't want to take lands, for the most part. Their main goal was to get some riches to bring back home.

The "Virgin": And, let's not forget that raiding parties were small groups with contemporary weaponry. If they hung around too long, they could find themselves in a battle.

Sigourney Weaver: Which they would have loved, for the chance to die in battle and-

Wot: We don't really know that. Everything we think we know about Vikings really comes from the reports of Christians who had an interest in making the viking religion look either evil or silly.

The "Virgin": Besides, someone has to live to take the gold back to the families of the warriors. The point being that part of the reason that giving the money worked is because the alternative had legitimate threat involved.

Wot: And, how long has this operation been going on?

Sigourney Weaver: Since before recorded history! When other peoples were learning to tie sticks and rocks together, we were holding back ultimate destruction-

Wot: So, sticks and stones were enough for the old gods to sense a legitimate threat.

The "Virgin": Otherwise, if they wanted our blood and suffering, they would just keep taking it and causing it, respectively. And, they could keep making us breed to do it.

Wot: Classic Dystopian situation.

Sigourney Weaver: You are meddling in traditions older than you can imagine.

The "Virgin": Have you ever read Shirley Jackson's "The Lottery"?

Sigourney Weaver: Do you honestly believe that not one person has, in the entire history, thought to throw a grenade down the hole?

Wot: I think you've got a lot of organization around here built on making sure people don't have that opportunity. And, anybody who might propose that gets shut down pretty fast.

The "Virgin": And, everybody else has already been a part of killing so many people that you don't want to think it isn't necessary. It's classic gambler-logic that you've put so much into it that it has to be worth it.

Wot: And that you got to this point by constant escalation. Always having the next amount of sacrifice and effort become the norm, so you have to step up so they don't get angry.

The "Virgin": Starts out with a fatted calf or some grain.

Wot: Then it escalates into people.

The "Virgin": Virgin girls, usually in cultures that devalued women but valued virginity as sole womb-ownership of the man.

Wot: Over time, it gets to here.

The "Virgin": Eventually, you're killing one out of every two humans, to keep these gods satisfied.

Wot: Then, you've destroyed humanity all by yourself.

The "Virgin": And, the ancient gods your so afraid of get the job done without having to do anything.

Wot: All because you never stopped to look at the dynamic of bullies in the playground.

The "Virgin": So, no, I'm not going to kill my friend. The gods will rise and the world has enough bullets to put 'em right back into the ground.

Sigourney Weaver: What if you're wrong?

Wot: Then, at least they had to do their own work at the end, rather than humanity doing it for them.