Black Hat Brigade: Episode 38
May. 24th, 2016 10:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wingedbeastCamera shot of the ocean from a beach. A longboat crests waves into view. A tall, strong-looking figure stands steering the longboat by two ropes attached to the sail, one rope in each hand. As the longboat comes closer, the figure appears to wear a fictional-styled horned helm. The camera zooms in and focuses to see that the figure does not wear a helm at all. The Minotaur steers the longboat to the beach.
Ed leaps from the longboat, then jumps around, laughing.: Up and down and left and right and around and around and around!
The Minotaur leans down to lift up the visibly woozy Shenzi and Banzai.
Shenzi: How can he stand it?
Banzai: He's always like that, his feet just agreed with his mind for once.
The Minotaur carefully sets the two on the beach.
Shenzi: Thanks... eh... Minotaur. I... I need a moment. Can you stop Ed?
Ed shoots for the edge of the beach.
The Minotaur leaps into the air to land and scoop Ed up into a football carry.
Ed runs for a couple seconds before he realizes his feet aren't on the ground. He looks up at the Minotaur and chortles.
Banzai belly flops down on the sand with a groan: Thanks again, Big Guy.
Shenzi takes a couple gulps of breath, then a couple test-steps. She shakes a bit but manages a stable step.
Shenzi: We're as ready as we're going to be. Ed, play the lay-in-wait game. Banzai, get back on your feet. Minotaur, if you would please set up the sled. We'll pull it, but... well... you're the one with thumbs.
The Minotaur sets Ed down. Ed rushes to "hide" behind the boat for imaginary prey on the other side. The Minotaur sets up the sled with three ropes, a paper-wrapped roundish something, and a pumpkin.
Banzai gets shakily to his feet: That pumpkin's for you, Big Guy. Those humans like that stuff in everything, bread, pie, like a bazillian kind of drinks of that hot stuff that they like best when it's cat poop. We figured you'd like it.
Shenzi: Ed, take a rope.
The Minotaur moves Ed over to the sled, then picks up the pumpkin to bite into the rind.
Banzai: Like it?
The Minotaur takes a moment to slowly chew over the rind and meat of the pumpkin, his jaw working around and around to grind the pumpkin down. Finally, he gives a nod.
Banzai: Is it... is it as spicy as they seem to think?
The Minotaur gives Banzai an unreadable look, then shakes his head no.
Ed: Told you. Humans make no sense.
Banzai: And that's Ed saying it.
Shenzi: Never mind that. Ed, what's the rule?
Ed: Stay to the sage.
Shenzi: Why's that?
Ed: No sage means not safe.
Shenzi: Same goes for you, Big Guy.
The Minotaur nods.
Shenzi takes up the rope and stands to pull the sled. Banzai and Ed follow suit.
The Hyenas and the Minotaur walk past the beach to the fields of sage that cover most of the island.
The group stops. Camera shifts up and pans down to see a wide circular clearing, bare of sage. At the center is a great, grey wolf.
The Minotaur looks over the clearing, the only one standing above the sage. He takes a bite out of the pumpkin.
Shenzi: If we're not welcome here, we'll just leave.
Fenris: You're not the first heroes to come to stop the end of the world. I always welcome a meal.
Shenzi: We're not here to save the world... not from you anyway. And, we did bring you some food. Maybe it could have been a hero, if it made it to adulthood. But, hey, you gotta eat.
Fenris: Cycle of Life?
Ed growls: No great cycles. No place for anybody! Nobody belongs!
Banzai: I think we've all been screwed over by that kind of a-place-for-everybody-and-everybody-in-their-place kind of thinking.
Shenzi: It wasn't the young warthog's place to die. It wasn't ours to kill it. It was just what we needed to do in order to do what we want to do. That's the reality. It doesn't need to do anything more than be what it is.
Fenris looks to the area where the voices are coming from.: Most heroes don't attack me with nihilistic existentialism.
The Minotaur opens the package then tosses the body of a half-grown warthog into the circle. It rolls and stops in front of Fenris.
Shenzi: We're not trying to be heroes to save the world from you. We're not trying to be heroes at all. But, we can save you from... you know... this.
Fenris looks at the warthog with suspicion.
Shenzi: It's not poisoned or anything.
Banzai: Besides, you're a wolf that's the offspring of a half-god half-giant. Is there anything that could poison you?
Ed chortles: Garlic and onions and hummus!
Banzai: No, Ed, the question was what would poison him. Not what would make him poison the air for miles around.
Fenris sniffs at the warthog: If you're here to save me, why don't you step forward?
Shenzi: Well, if you'll kill us and eat us if we do that, now... and not necessarily in that order.
Fenris: Of course I won't. Of course I believe you.
Fenris eats the warthog in one gulp, not even pausing to bite or chew.
The Minotaur sighs and takes another bite into his pumpkin. Some seeds spill out.
Banzai: You've dealt with people trying to trick you before, haven't you?
Ed growls: A friend and king with love and trust and a coward's betrayal.
Fenris pauses a moment, looking to where Ed's voice came from.
Fenris: Yes... that.
Ed: A god of wisdom should be wise.
Banzai: A god that demands others face their deaths bravely should show courage.
Fenris: An allfather should care for those that love him.
Banzai: Okay, even pretending that there's a deity's advocate here to say that there was a prophecy that said that you were going to eat him...
Shenzi: Odin should be wise enough to know that a prophecy's either going to happen or it's not. You can't make it not happen and being a dick to an immortal god-wolf isn't going to accomplish anything.
Banzai: Or that there are versions of the story where Odin didn't trick Fenris into this, but had to battle him into this, with Tyr losing his hand in the process.
Shenzi: It's still dooming a living being to years, centuries of... well... this kind of starvation. Surely, in all of Asgard, there are gods of healing or justice, if not redemption.
Ed: Or just one god of wisdom to see the value in turning an enemy into an ally.
Banzai: It's not about personal moral purity. It's about respecting a living being as a being that lives and has its own experience and not treating its destruction as alright just because it's convenient.
Ed: And, if you have to hurt something, not treating it as though something big makes it all alright. It's still not fair.
Fenris sits on his haunches: Let's say I believe you. Why?
Ed: Violence and rage and the lawful demanding that they be called good.
Banzai: The Black Hat Brigade has been fighting for justice on behalf of those wronged by their canons.
Shenzi: And, well... we don't want to be assholes about it, but there's going to be a fight, some day. It's not always going to be just critique against critique. So, we're going to need some muscle, some people ready to fight for this justice, for their right to live, their right to expect a little respect for their own stories, their right to just... be in a way that's not convenient.
Ed: No more Cycle of Life. Just Life!
Ed leaps from the longboat, then jumps around, laughing.: Up and down and left and right and around and around and around!
The Minotaur leans down to lift up the visibly woozy Shenzi and Banzai.
Shenzi: How can he stand it?
Banzai: He's always like that, his feet just agreed with his mind for once.
The Minotaur carefully sets the two on the beach.
Shenzi: Thanks... eh... Minotaur. I... I need a moment. Can you stop Ed?
Ed shoots for the edge of the beach.
The Minotaur leaps into the air to land and scoop Ed up into a football carry.
Ed runs for a couple seconds before he realizes his feet aren't on the ground. He looks up at the Minotaur and chortles.
Banzai belly flops down on the sand with a groan: Thanks again, Big Guy.
Shenzi takes a couple gulps of breath, then a couple test-steps. She shakes a bit but manages a stable step.
Shenzi: We're as ready as we're going to be. Ed, play the lay-in-wait game. Banzai, get back on your feet. Minotaur, if you would please set up the sled. We'll pull it, but... well... you're the one with thumbs.
The Minotaur sets Ed down. Ed rushes to "hide" behind the boat for imaginary prey on the other side. The Minotaur sets up the sled with three ropes, a paper-wrapped roundish something, and a pumpkin.
Banzai gets shakily to his feet: That pumpkin's for you, Big Guy. Those humans like that stuff in everything, bread, pie, like a bazillian kind of drinks of that hot stuff that they like best when it's cat poop. We figured you'd like it.
Shenzi: Ed, take a rope.
The Minotaur moves Ed over to the sled, then picks up the pumpkin to bite into the rind.
Banzai: Like it?
The Minotaur takes a moment to slowly chew over the rind and meat of the pumpkin, his jaw working around and around to grind the pumpkin down. Finally, he gives a nod.
Banzai: Is it... is it as spicy as they seem to think?
The Minotaur gives Banzai an unreadable look, then shakes his head no.
Ed: Told you. Humans make no sense.
Banzai: And that's Ed saying it.
Shenzi: Never mind that. Ed, what's the rule?
Ed: Stay to the sage.
Shenzi: Why's that?
Ed: No sage means not safe.
Shenzi: Same goes for you, Big Guy.
The Minotaur nods.
Shenzi takes up the rope and stands to pull the sled. Banzai and Ed follow suit.
The Hyenas and the Minotaur walk past the beach to the fields of sage that cover most of the island.
The group stops. Camera shifts up and pans down to see a wide circular clearing, bare of sage. At the center is a great, grey wolf.
The Minotaur looks over the clearing, the only one standing above the sage. He takes a bite out of the pumpkin.
Shenzi: If we're not welcome here, we'll just leave.
Fenris: You're not the first heroes to come to stop the end of the world. I always welcome a meal.
Shenzi: We're not here to save the world... not from you anyway. And, we did bring you some food. Maybe it could have been a hero, if it made it to adulthood. But, hey, you gotta eat.
Fenris: Cycle of Life?
Ed growls: No great cycles. No place for anybody! Nobody belongs!
Banzai: I think we've all been screwed over by that kind of a-place-for-everybody-and-everybody-in-their-place kind of thinking.
Shenzi: It wasn't the young warthog's place to die. It wasn't ours to kill it. It was just what we needed to do in order to do what we want to do. That's the reality. It doesn't need to do anything more than be what it is.
Fenris looks to the area where the voices are coming from.: Most heroes don't attack me with nihilistic existentialism.
The Minotaur opens the package then tosses the body of a half-grown warthog into the circle. It rolls and stops in front of Fenris.
Shenzi: We're not trying to be heroes to save the world from you. We're not trying to be heroes at all. But, we can save you from... you know... this.
Fenris looks at the warthog with suspicion.
Shenzi: It's not poisoned or anything.
Banzai: Besides, you're a wolf that's the offspring of a half-god half-giant. Is there anything that could poison you?
Ed chortles: Garlic and onions and hummus!
Banzai: No, Ed, the question was what would poison him. Not what would make him poison the air for miles around.
Fenris sniffs at the warthog: If you're here to save me, why don't you step forward?
Shenzi: Well, if you'll kill us and eat us if we do that, now... and not necessarily in that order.
Fenris: Of course I won't. Of course I believe you.
Fenris eats the warthog in one gulp, not even pausing to bite or chew.
The Minotaur sighs and takes another bite into his pumpkin. Some seeds spill out.
Banzai: You've dealt with people trying to trick you before, haven't you?
Ed growls: A friend and king with love and trust and a coward's betrayal.
Fenris pauses a moment, looking to where Ed's voice came from.
Fenris: Yes... that.
Ed: A god of wisdom should be wise.
Banzai: A god that demands others face their deaths bravely should show courage.
Fenris: An allfather should care for those that love him.
Banzai: Okay, even pretending that there's a deity's advocate here to say that there was a prophecy that said that you were going to eat him...
Shenzi: Odin should be wise enough to know that a prophecy's either going to happen or it's not. You can't make it not happen and being a dick to an immortal god-wolf isn't going to accomplish anything.
Banzai: Or that there are versions of the story where Odin didn't trick Fenris into this, but had to battle him into this, with Tyr losing his hand in the process.
Shenzi: It's still dooming a living being to years, centuries of... well... this kind of starvation. Surely, in all of Asgard, there are gods of healing or justice, if not redemption.
Ed: Or just one god of wisdom to see the value in turning an enemy into an ally.
Banzai: It's not about personal moral purity. It's about respecting a living being as a being that lives and has its own experience and not treating its destruction as alright just because it's convenient.
Ed: And, if you have to hurt something, not treating it as though something big makes it all alright. It's still not fair.
Fenris sits on his haunches: Let's say I believe you. Why?
Ed: Violence and rage and the lawful demanding that they be called good.
Banzai: The Black Hat Brigade has been fighting for justice on behalf of those wronged by their canons.
Shenzi: And, well... we don't want to be assholes about it, but there's going to be a fight, some day. It's not always going to be just critique against critique. So, we're going to need some muscle, some people ready to fight for this justice, for their right to live, their right to expect a little respect for their own stories, their right to just... be in a way that's not convenient.
Ed: No more Cycle of Life. Just Life!
no subject
Date: 2016-05-25 03:03 pm (UTC)Is Fenrisulfr going to take the bait, though? It can't be the first time someone's tried to unleash him in battle.
no subject
Date: 2016-05-27 06:05 am (UTC)